Live. Love. Let Go.

Music: Love Hurts - Incubus
Mood: Content
Date/Time: Tuesday, 8th December, 2009/3:45AM


The last time I wrote in this blog was October 21st, when I had to share a profound statement that came to me as I returned from watching a friend participating in an event at Dover in St. Ann.

And now, I find myself writing again, after getting home at something after 1AM after spending quality time with the two persons that were there when I made that profound statement. In reality, it was 5 of us in total - and it made me realise that the best moments in life - the moments I will always remember are never in a crowded room - but in a room filled with love.


And as we sat in the living room of my friend's new house - we talked about life, love and everything in between. It reminded me that even though last week was the anniversary of that life-changing event that broke me and literally shook me to the core - that I am still surrounded by persons that love me.

As the end of 2009 approaches, I think of all the things I've been through in this year...and I have to ask myself why I'm not more bitter, why I'm not more resentful, and why I do not carry hatred in my heart every single day. I ask myself why most days I wake up with a smile, or more curious what is for breakfast, or wonder if I'm late for an appointment of some sort.

Is it the grace of God? The warm embrace of those who love me? Or is it the inner strength I've acquired over the years that has made me much more resilient than I should be, given what happened?

I have found that as this past year has waned, I reached a point where I stopped updating my private blog that held all my angst, and pain and tears - and started blogging more publicly here. And even here, I find myself needing to write less, not because my days are filled with distractions - but because I have less baggage to carry into each day.

I have my issues of course, don't we all? But I find as the days wane, and the sunsets pass - I look forward more to the future and all those "maybe" plans turning into "definitely".
I find that my frowns have turned into smiles. And I find that what once were tears of sadness are now tears of joy being wiped from my eyes between bouts of gut-twisting laughter.

The dark days still exist, but I find the weather on the emotional horizon to be much more sunny, much more bright, and even in the darkness of this December night - I see rainbows and clear skies in the forecast for tomorrow.

I love, I laugh and I continue to live.
And yes ladies and gentlemen, I am incredibly content.




Love,
Ally.

Photo Credit: Lying in an orange grove on a Sunny Sunday; Sunday, 6th December, 2009

Video Credit: Love Hurts by Incubus posted by youtube user incubusTV